


Back to the beginning

by Halfblood_Jamie



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Engagement, M/M, larry stylinson - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-23
Updated: 2019-10-23
Packaged: 2020-12-31 16:44:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21148934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Halfblood_Jamie/pseuds/Halfblood_Jamie
Summary: When Louis Tomlinson accepted to be a judge on the same show he got famous in he didn't know how hard it's gonna be to press down his memories he didn't really think about for eight years and the familiar house didn't help him at all.





	Back to the beginning

**Author's Note:**

> My work has flashbacks in it which are marked with "^^^" and "vvv" in the beginning and the end of each one.

Harry stopped the car in front of the familiar house. Louis and Harry both looked up to see how much it had changed during the years. Not that much, Louis thought. He vividly remembered how it was like to see it at the first time years ago.

^^^

Louis couldn’t sit still in the car as the GPS said they were getting close to the House. He was so excited to see the others again. He hadn’t seen his bandmates since they got back from Spain which was kind of bad as they probably should’ve rehears. He tried to spot the House before they actually got there but there were too many trees to see anything behind them. His mum turned left and he gaped at the sight. At the end of the road there was the biggest house he’d ever seen. It was huge and yellow and old and beautiful and almost castle-like. It even had a little round tower just a bit taller than the roof. There were a couple of cars already in the car park and he spotted a familiar blond head. He looked around again if any of the others were there yet but he couldn’t see anyone other than Niall. They parked at the very end of the car park and Louis got out of the car immidiately to let Niall know he arrived.

’’Oi Niall” he shouted from across the way shutting the car door behind him. Niall’s head shot up as he turned around and smiled widely as soon as he recognised Louis. He waved at him above his head and pointed at his bags then the huge house saying he’s ready to go inside. Louis raised his indexfinger showing Niall that he needs one more minute making blonde one wait for him.

Louis turned back to his mum getting his bag out of the trunk wondering when will the others arrive. Will they have a rehearsal today already or they’re getting a day to settle in? He couldn’t decide which option would he be happier with. He gave a goodbye kiss to his mum and hugged her tightly.

’’Good luck Boo Bear” his mum said to his ear. ’’Although I know you don’t need luck. You’re such a talented young man. I’m so happy that I’ve got to be your mother. I’m really proud of you” Louis felt his eyes filling with tears so he blinked a couple of times quickly before he let go of his mum.

’’Thanks mum. I’ll call you in the evening right” he said grabbing his bag from the ground. His mum nodded and kissed his forehead. Louis shut his eyes and hold her arm which was on his shoulder. His mum then turned around and sat back into the car. He knew she was about to cry and didn’t want Louis to see. He turned too to join the waiting Niall at the spot his parents’ car was parked at a couple of minutes earlier.

’’Come on you mumma’s boy” Niall said teasingly when Louis got closer. He smacked the back of the blond’s head which Niall started laughing at.

’’Shut your trap chicken head. Let’s find our room. Is anyone here yet?” he asked. Niall nodded walking up the front stairs.

’’I’ve heard Zayn’s name but I’m not sure if because he’s here or because he’s gonna be late again” Niall giggled. ’’And Harry’s already inside” Louis was wondering why his stomach flipped at the news as they walked inside the House.

vvv

Louis sighed at the memory and turned to look at Harry next to him. He was still looking at the House his chin resting on the wheel. 

’’I thought it would look much more different. It looks almost exactly the same. So much has changed and still this house hasn’t changed at all.” Harry said looking away from the house locking eyes with Louis. He knew exactly what Harry was talking about since he was thinking about the same thing. Louis looked at the House one more time. 

’’I know. It kinda feels like starting over a little bit but on the other side of the competition. It’s quite weird and exciting at the same time. I hope I can be as much of a good mentor as I want to be” Louis said looking down to his hands in his lap. Harry reached out and hold both of Louis’ hands in one of his.

’’You’re a great mentor and a friend to them already. You’re moving in with them for God’s sake. Don’t worry about it love. You’re awesome” Louis smiled widely and leaned into a kiss. It was short but deep and full of emotions.

’’I gotta go. Want to do a couple of things before the boys arrive” he said opening the door. They both got out of the car and Harry took the suitcase out of the trunk while Louis got his backpack from the back seat.

’’I’ll call you in the evening when everyone’s settled in.” Louis said taking his suitcase from his boyfriend. Harry nodded and bent down to kiss Louis one more time. Louis chuckled as he returned the kiss wrapping his free hand around Harry’s neck. They parted smiling at each other for a moment before Louis fixed his backpack on his shoulder and turned towards the House. He looked back from the top of the front stairs and blow a kiss to Harry who jumped and pretended to catch it in the air threw it into his mouth and ate it. Louis laughted out loud at the silliness of his boyfriend and he was still smiling when he entered the House.

* * *

Louis soon found out that his room was the exact same one which the band stayed in back in 2010. It wasn’t a coinciedence he knew for sure. He expected it if he wanted to be honest but still was a little bit surprised when he saw it on the paper by the front door. He walked up the stairs not even thinking where his room was. He remembered it perfectly despite he wasn’t even near the House for eight years. He reached for the door and froze with the doorknob in his hand. There was a laminated paper sticked on the outside of the door with his name on it but in the background instead of the gold X what was in every other nametag there was a picture of the band in that room. He shook his head smiling as he opened the door. He felt 18 again as he walked in and threw his backpack on his bad. The room looked different a little. They definitely changed the furniture since he was there but someone must’ve really liked the previous ones because the new ones looked exactly the same. He smirked as he got down on his knees and checked the underside of the bed opposite his. Yep, definitely new. He and Zayn broke that bed one time when they jumped on it. It was easily fixable with a few screws but Simon wasn’t too happy about it anyway. He put his suitcase in the corner of the room deciding to unpack later and checking on the rehearsal rooms instead. He stopped at the door when a little thought crossed his mind for a second of not unpacking at all. He didn’t know how long would he be in the competition afterall. Realising how stupid he was he walked downstairs searching for his rehearsal room. 

It looked entirely different from what it used to look like and Louis wasn’t sure if it’s because of the new and modern looking furniture or because it wasn’t the same room he used to rehears in with the band. He really liked being back in the House it made him feel very nostalgic. After checking all the things in the boys’ rehearsal room and changing a couple of things up making it ready for rehearsals he decided not go back upstairs in the main staircase but instead he went straight to the very back of the House where he knew he was gonna find the stairs. Their stairs. 

^^^

’’I’ve found it!” Liam stormed into the room almost shouting. Louis was sitting on his bed next to Harry. They were listening to their song which they were going to perform next Saturday trying to memorize the lyrics before rehearsals started. Niall was on his phone in the bottom bunk bed and Zayn was sleeping above him moving a little to the sudden loud sound but not waking up.

’’Found what?” asked Harry lowering his phone resting the back of his hand on Louis’ thigh. Louis looked down at Harry’s hand his heartbeat rising but didn’t say anything.

’’The perfect spot to film the diaries we’ve talked about” said Liam exitedly. Louis and Harry looked at each other and Niall looked up at Liam from his phone.

’’You do realise it’s only 7 am Liam. Zayn didn’t even wake up yet and I’m not gonna be the one who wakes him.” Niall said still a bit sleepily.

’’Yeah o’course not. I’ll wake him. But just found the place. The back stairs. We still have a little time to film it before rehearsal today haven’t we. We don’t have too much to talk about anyways” Liam gestured towards the door that he left open when he entered. Harry sighed and stood up leaving a now cold spot on Louis’ thigh. Louis rubbed his hand over it to warm it up and get rid of the strange feeling of the lack of Harry’s hand. Niall glanced at him from the corner of his eyes questioningly . 

’’Yeah great. Just wake Zayn up” as the words left Harry’s mouth they heard Zayn moving around. All four of them looked at him as Zayn peeked down from his bed looking a little confused.

’’What’s going on?” he asked his voice raspy from sleep.

’’You’re up. Excellent. We’re filming in ten minutes. Get up” Liam instructed him searching for his camera. 

In fifteen minutes they were all set up at the back stairs. Louis sat down in the middle of the stairs close to the wall looking at Harry hoping he would choose the spot next to him to sit in the narrow place. Before Harry even turned around from fixing the camera angle a blond head appeard next to Louis. He looked at Niall’s smiling face and couldn’t help but smile back. He was disappointed that Harry wasn’t going to sit next to him but who could send away the cute little Irish boy. Harry sat down in front of Niall in just the perfect distance for Louis to play with his hair. They talked about their room a little not having anything concrete to be able to talk about yet. It wasn’t the biggest room in the House but they managed.

’’Sharing a room with four of our best friends in the world” Harry said holding on Liam and Louis’ shoulder looking up directly at Louis a couple of times.

’’Aaah Harry” Louis couldn’t help himself but to cup the curly one’s face in his hands and looking down at him fondly ignoring Liam’s disapproving look and Zayn almost snapping Niall’s neck behind him. They finished filming pretty soon comparing to what they had expected beforehand and after packing up their stuff they went to the kitchen for breakfast.

vvv

Louis couldn’t resist but to sit down take his phone out from the pocket of his tracksuit bottoms and open his Instagram account. When he opened the camera he realised that he’s almost in complete dark so he reached out and turned the lights on without even looking.

’’Oi good morning lads. Just wanted to update you a bit that I’ve arrived in the X-Factor house. I’m feeling very nostalgic I gotta admit that yeah yeah. Look where I’m sitting at” he talked to his phone holding it a bit further from his face at his last words to show the stairs to the camera. ’’I’m just waiting for me boys to arrive now. And if somebody needs help, Superman is here. I’m not going anywhere lads don’t forget that. I hope you all have a good day and you’re looking forward to the live shows as much as I do. And to me boys. Hurry up, I’m bored now” he finished the video being totally aware of that he quoted himself from a video diary. He made the video with the intention to upload as a story but he changed his mind. He wanted to see the comments blow up as everyone freaked out about his location so he uploaded as a normal post. Louis sat there for another half an hour reading the comments and smiling over the mess he made. After a while he realised that the sounds around him got louder and he assumed the contestants were arriving. He knew he should go and greet them but he was so entertained by the comments on his video that he wanted to sit there for a little bit longer. As he looked down at his phone again to read a couple more comments he heard someone from the end of the corridor.

’’Figured you’d still be here. If you wanted to hide then it wasn’t a wise thing to do to upload the video you made man” said Anthony in his thick accent. Louis laughed at that and stood up to face Anthony.

’’Wasn’t hiding you idiot ’’Louis said smiling to Anthony and throwing an arm around his neck starting to walk the way Anthony came from ’’Come on big boy let’s gather the others”

* * *

Louis felt happy and content as he walked into his room. The boys were really great and they all chose great songs too. First rehearsal went better than he thought it would with all four of his boys. It made him even more excited for the live shows than he already was. He was surprised when Armstrong said he wanted to sing Story of My Life and even change it a bit. He didn’t really like the idea of changing the song being one of his favourites but he thought he would be excited about how it turns out if it wouldn’t be his song so he let Armstong do what he wanted to. He definitely was curious about what the boy will do with it. 

He tried to call Harry on his way back to his room but he got declined. He wasn’t annoyed he knew Harry only declined him when there was no way that they could talk properly even for a minute. Since he did everything he planned for that day he grabbed a book and decided to go back to the stairs. he started to realise that he really liked and missed those stairs. He sat down with his back to the wall and his feet on the same stair he was sitting on and started to read. He barely read two pages when his phone rang. He picked it up from the stair one above him and smiled when he saw Harry’s face on his screen.

’’NO! Jimmy protested” he shouted picking up the FaceTime call. Harry looked a bit confused at first so Louis turned his camera around to let Harry see where he was. When he finally realised what Louis was on about he started laughing. The sound warmed Louis’ heart. 

’’You bloody idiot” Harry said when he stopped laughing ’’I had no idea what was that for. I thought you picked up by accident and I’m interrupting or something” he continued smiling. Louis smiled back at him being even happier than he already was to see his boyfriend. 

’’How was your day?” he asked. Harry’s smile become tired and the shining of his eyes faded a little. Louis knew he had some troubles to take care of again. ’’What happened?”

’’Nothing I couldn’t fix really. Apparently someone saw me drop you off this morning and took a bunch of pictures. He sold it to a newspaper which had experiences with us already so they took our side. Or the management’s side at least. Or their financial side even. They knew our management would pay them more than they would make if they’d release the pictures. I’m not sure if I’m happy about it to be honest. I’d rather have them release pictures of us. I’m so tired of this by now. Everyone knows we’re together it’s just an open secret for the public. It’s kind of emberassing to lie about it and pretending not to be together after all those years. And what does it show about us? That we think that it’s something to be emberassed about? How are we supposed to be good role models if we’re forced to show a side of us that doesn’t even exist? Young people would need us to be out already. To know that they don’t have to hide in a bloody closet either. I’m making the gayest shows ever I’m flirting with all the men in the crowds for God’s sake and still there are people who genuenly think I’m fucking every girl who crosses my way in my freetime. I really would want a paparazzi to choose an asshole paper who wants to hurt us and just releases the pictures not caring about how much money they’d get if they’d contact the management ’’ Harry looked so much older than he actually was when he finished his monologue. Louis’ heart ached a little at what he heard. He usually was there with Harry to deal with these things with him or sometimes he just went alone and didn’t even tell his boyfriend because he knows how annoyed and sad Harry gets about it. 

’’I’m sorry sun. I should’ve been there with you. I don’t like the thought of you having to deal with this alone at all’’ he said with a serious face. Just like that his cheerful mood was gone. He wanted to punch someone in the face for doing these things. For a moment he thought of punching Simon him being the main reason why those things were still happening to them but he reckoned that would just make things worse and they needed everything but that. A new thought started to sink into Louis’ mind.

’’Let’s leak a selfie tonight then, shall we? I have some in stock that I’ve already edited a watermark on. All made by you of course to make it seem more fake. You up for it?’’ he asked with a mischievous smirk on his face. He knew Harry loved messing with the system almost as much as he did and leaking their selfies as fan edits were his favourite. He was right his boyfriend’s face lit up immidiately and he nodded several times. 

’’Yeah that’s a great idea! I love how they still haven’t realised that half of the fanarts are real. Our managament is so dumb. They should check out one or two fan pages sometimes to know how much they’re fucked everything up’’ Harry said with a smile back on his face. ’’Anyway. How was your day? Did any of the boys chose one of our songs? I sure hope so”

’’Actually Armstrong chose Story of My Life” Louis said his mood cheering up as he thought of the successful day. ’’But he wants so change it to fit his style more. I let him but I don’t know how I feel about it”

’’I’m sure it’s gonna be a great version. From what you’ve told me about him he’s very talented and I’m sure he doesn’t want to mess up his mentor’s song. Also you can’t expect every performance of our songs to be exatly the same as the original. They’re not us love. And it wouldn’t be so good either if he sang the original version since the theme is This Is Me this week. That wouldn’t be him. That would be us” Louis knew his boyfriend was right but he couldn’t help how he felt. He suspected that he rather missed the band, even more now when he was back in the House where they started. They talked for another hour, both feeling quite nostalgic. 

When they hang up the phone Louis was thinking about how far they’ve come over the years. He didn’t even think that they could be together at all ever when they first met and he didn’t dare to imagine that they would be together after eight years. 

^^^

The band made it through eight weeks so far which was a bit surprising to all of them. Louis managed to sit next to Harry in four of the diaries out of nine which he was really happy about. They had little moments during these times and off camera too and that really warmed Louis’ heart. Harry fell asleep in Louis’ bed regulalry closer to him that it was necessary simply because they were chatting for hours long every night. He always got back in his own bed through the night which was a thing that made Louis pretty annoyed. He wanted to wake up next to the curly one for once but he thought Harry might not wanted the others to know. Which was silly since he got into Louis’ bed every damn night in front of them and there wasn’t anything to know anyway. He came to terms with him liking Harry the way he never liked any guy before, or girl for that matter, but he didn’t like that it still wasn’t clear if Harry was into guys or not. 

Until the previous week’s video diary.

It was the last question that Niall chose for them that week and he was really looking forward to it. When Liam asked which celebrity would they marry he got quite nervous and Harry turning back to look at him expectedly didn’t really help his nerves calm down. He chickened out and couldn’t answear before Harry so he just said he needed more time to think and gently slapped Harry’s shoulder to pass him the question. Harry froze for a nano second then he blurted out David Hasselhoff’s name really fast as he was afraid he’d change his mind. Louis’ brain almost broke at the new information and after Niall and Liam also answered the question he just couldn’t resist to say that he’d marry Harry. Since he was always joking about everything in the diaries no one realised that he actually meant it even if he was thinking years from then. After they finished filming, he didn’t stand up but stayed on the stair looking down at his hands. Much to his surprise Harry did the same thing. Niall hurried to gather the camera stuff and told Liam and Zayn to help him take it back to their room almost if he knew Louis and Harry wanted to be left alone. Louis looked up at the blond one who smiled and winked at him. How did he know everything, Louis never understood. When the others left they sat there in silence for a minute or so both feeling really nervous. 

’’So… David Hasselhoff, ha?” Louis asked forcing on a joking tone. 

’’Uh, well, yeah. I think he’s quite attractive. I’d like to have a husband like him or I don’t know. Not now. In the future. Not in the near future. When I’m 60. Wait no that’s too old. Uh, I don’t know when” Harry trailed off and obviously was really nervous but his tremling made Louis feel a bit calmer. 

’’Yeah 60 feels a bit old indeed” he said smiling. Harry didn’t look up when he moved to sit on the opposite side of the stairs to face Louis. 

’’The others didn’t look too surprised though. Have you told them before?” Louis asked thinking about why he was the only one who wanted to talk to Harry.

’’Well I didn’t told them intentionally. Liam accidentally heard when I was talking to my mum about a guy I like here and he told Zayn because he wasn’t sure if he should talk to me about it or not and Niall just knew. I don’t know how. I’m sorry for not telling you. I just didn’t know how. You’re like my best friend now and I didn’t want anything to change because of this” Harry said looking up at Louis but he didn’t hear a thing after Harry said he liked someone. Oh god how stupid he was. Of course he liked someone. And barely fifteen minutes ago he said he would marry him. No wonder Harry looked weird after he said it. He liked someone else. He bet it was Aiden. That son of a bitch why did he have to be so handsome. Louis felt devastated. He didn’t want to show his disappointment so he just pretended to have a normal chat with his best mate who just happened to be a bloody attractive gay man. He hoped his face didn’t betray him but when he looked at Harry again he was scanning his face with curiosity. Louis shok his head a little and put on a weak smile.

’’You were talking about a guy you liked with your mum?” he asked raising one eyebrow. Harry looked down again and looked quite uncomfortable what made Louis regret his comment.

’’Uh yeah. I always do that. She’s my best friend and gives the best advice. Well I guess she’s my second best friend now. After you” he said looking up at Louis again and smiling sheepishly. Ah that word again, Louis thought. Best friends. He bloody didn’t want to be his best friend. Knowing that Harry was into guys made it harder to hide or deny his feelings towards him. He forced his smile back.

’’Yeah my mum is also my best friend. Or second best friend I guess” he said hoping that it would make Harry feel better after his previous comment. ’’And what great advice did your mum give you this time?” he asked still smiling but he really didn’t want to know. He only asked it because he knew if he didn’t fancy Harry he’d ask the same thing. Much to his surprise the other boy looked even more uncomfortable than he did before and Louis didn’t understand why. ’’You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. I just wanted to chat” Louis said feeling quite uncomfortable himself. Harry looked down at his hands again and started picking on his nails. He opened his mouth as he was about to say something but then closed it again almost immediately. Louis didn’t know what he could say and the situation started to feel a bit awkward. 

’’She said uh…” Harry started his voice quiet and deeper than it usually was. He cleared his throat and linked his hands togehter in his lap still not looking up. ’’Well she said I could at least try to stay at his bed for a whole night instead of freaking out every night and going back to mine” he said at one breath pressing his hands together so hard that his knuckles got white.

’’Well yeah that would be a start if you two are that close that you’re in his bed every night” Louis answered harsher than he intended to. He couldn’t believe Harry was in someone else’s freaking bed every night and he didn’t even notice his absence. Then it hit him like an asteroid. Harry was in his bed every night. And he never stayed till the morning, not once. Harry was talking about HIM. Louis’ head shot up at the realization. He looked at Harry eyes wide open and his chin fell. It looked like Harry didn’t fancy Aiden afterall. Harry looked up at him under his lashes when he didn’t say anything more.

’’Say something please. I know you’re not like that and it’s okay I guess. I can stay in my bed if you feel uncomfortable about it now that you know that I like you. We can talk like that too quietly so we don’t bother the others. If you still want to of course” Harry was trembling again but Louis didn’t care. It was cute. Also he said it out loud. Harry like him too. That was all Louis needed to wake from his shock. His mouth turned into an honest and wide smile.

’’As I said, staying at his bed would be a start. A good one too. You were right. Your mum does give the best advice” he said mischievously and watched Harry’s face change as he understood what he was saying.

’’So you’re… You too… You’re saying that…” Harry couldn’t finish one sentence and he started to look like a tomato. A handsome tomato, Louis thought. He shifted away from the wall a bit closer to Harry taking one hand on Harry’s knee next to his own. Harry’s eyes widened but he slowly placed his hand on top of Louis’ and shifted closer too. Louis breathed in sharply at the movement and couldn’t help himself not to look at Harry’s lips.

’’Yeah. I’m saying that I like you too” he whispered right before he closed the remaining space between them and kissed Harry. His stomach flipped and his chest tightened at the feeling. He never felt anything like that before. He didn’t notice when his hands came to life and cupped Harry’s face to keep him in place whilst Harry’s hands moved to his hips and shoulder. Louis couldn’t resist to burry his hand into Harry’s curls. He’d done it before but the feeling was so different now that he was kissing him. When they ran out of breath Louis leaned back just enough to be able to look into Harry’s eyes properly and smoothed his thumb over Harry’s lower lip following its line.

’’What? Did you get lipstick on me?” Harry asked with a shy smile. Louis snorted at the tease and pinched Harry’s lip gently.

’’No. You’re a really great kisser despite being so young” he said smiling. Harry laughed at that warming Louis’ heart.

’’You’re not so bad yourself despite being so old” Louis narrowed his eyes at the retort then tilted Harry’s head up a little by his chin to give him a pack then he jumped up and ran up the stairs screaming. 

’’AAAHHH NOOO KRYPTONITE!!!” he screamed referring to the Superman t-shirt he was wearing. He heard Harry’s loud laugh from the bottom of the srairs. That sound definitely was his kryptonite.

vvv

Louis smiled fondly as he recalled the memory and stood up from the exact same stair that he was sitting on when he kissed Harry for the first time and went back to his room.

* * *

It was really early in the morning on the Monday following the first live shows. Louis was sitting on the couch in the rehearsal room thinking about the weekend. How did this happen? The song was great. Armstrong was great. The audience behind him seemed to love the new version of Story of My Life. It really showed what kind of artis Armstrong already was. Louis was gutted. He really thought the boy gonna make it to the finals. He really didn’t expect him to leave the competition on the first week. Althought Louis told him and all of his boys not to say or do anything that could piss Simon off. Armstrong didn’t really listen but it wasn’t that bad and Louis didn’t dare to imagine that Simon could be this mean. That’s one thing to make his and Harry’s life a nightmare but to destroy a young artist’s dreams and refuse to give him a proper chance? That was too much for him. 

He got up from the the couch when he heard his phone ringing on the other side of the room. It was Harry. Of course it was him. Harry tried to call him the night before right after the show ended but he didn’t answer. He wanted to be with Armstrong as much as he could and to make sure the boy won’t give up on his music. That would be a disaster. He looked out of the window as he picked up his phone from the windowsill and answered the FaceTime call.

’’Hey babe. Sorry for not picking up yesterday” Louis smiled unintentionally as he saw Harry’s face appear on his screen.

’’Actually I would’ve been surprised if you did. I just didn’t want you to not to know that I was thinking about you. How’re you? How’s Armstrong? It’s crazy. He was so good I’m telling you that boy is a real talent. I really liked his version of the song too it was fantastic’’ Harry said so fast Louis coundn’t have followed if he didn’t have so much practise in it. 

’’We’re good. Sad of course. Devistated even. I’m gutted. It seems like he takes it really well. I made sure that the lad doesn’t give up. It wasn’t his fault really. He left about half an hour ago. Speaking of, where are you going?” Louis asked checking the clock on the wall which showed that it was only 7:15 am and that meant that it was 11:15 pm in LA.

’’I’m going to the studio. Starting to write again I think. This LA weather makes me inspired” Harry got into a car and Louis heared the engine starting. Louis smiled to himself. His boyfriend must have had a great idea unless he wouldn’t go anywhere this time of the day.

’’Who are you writing this one with? I thought your band wasn’t in LA these days. Also just take your time sun. Don’t release a new album before I release my first one. That wouldn’t be too good” Louis said laughing a bit.

’’You’re right they’re not here. I just had an idea last night and it’s almost done on paper so I’m going in. And it’s your turn now don’t worry. But hurry up a bit I can’t wait for everyone to hear it. I’m almost more excited for it than I was for my own album. And it’s done for almost a year what are you waiting for?” Harry asked watching the road in front of him only glancing at Louis couple of times from the corner of his eyes. 

’’Not sure. The right time I guess. I wouldn’t have time for promo now. After X-Factor ended I’m gonna have much more time. I think January could be a right time. I promised one more single before the album anyway” Louis said actually thinking about it.

’’Sounds like a plan” Harry smirked then his face got serious. ’’Do you want to talk about yesterday? How was it?’’ Louis grinned he didn’t really want to talk about it.

’’He was so confident and happy on Friday and then it just ended in two days. It was really intense. There were a lot of mostly negative comments about his performance and song choice. No one really liked that he put a rap part in Story of My Life. It was like a big horrible flashback but worse because it wasn’t my life and I couldn’t do anything about it either. It reminded me a lot to our last weekend in the competition when we visited our home towns on Friday and everyone was so pumped and happy then we went home on the next day. Do you remember?” Louis asked thinking about the memory already not really hearing Harry saying ’How could I forget’ on the other side of the call.

^^^

Louis and the others were really excited to visit their hometowns again for the first time since the competition started. Except for Niall. The weather was really bad and all the flights were canceleed to Ireland so they did an Irish morning show from the X-Factor studios. Wasn’t the same tho. 

They were on the way to Holmes Chapel where they were greeted like superstars. Harry’s yard were full of people most of them Harry didn’t know himself either. Niall died laughing of an old school picture of Harry someone held up but Louis found it quite adorable. He knew Harry’s mum and Robin knew about the thing him and Harry had going on but he didn’t expect the warm hugs he got from both of them. Anne hugged him so tight he barely could breath. He wanted to shake hands with Robin at first but the older man pulled him into a manly but warm hug. They all gathered in the kitchen to film a little section for the show.

’’Absolutely great to have you home” started Robin ’’And the rest of the boys with you. It’s like.. You’re all family now. It’s been fantastic” Louis coundn’t help himself but to look at Harry smirking. Is he family now? He was a bit surprised that Harry was watching him too with a cute smile on his face. So he is family now. He could feel their love towards him in every word they spoke and it really warmed his heart. He knew Harry’s mum and stepfather accepted Harry’s choice of lover entirely but it quite supprised him how loving they acted towards him too. 

He still hadn’t figured out how to tell his mum that he’s now dating a boy. He was sure a hundred percent that his mum would be more than okay with it and she already loved Harry but it still gave him a hard time. When they visited Doncaster earlier that day it was all awkward between him and his mum. She was his best friend he told her everything and felt weird keeping a secret from her. He wanted to talk to her a bit and tell her everything but didn’t have the chance with cameras and his little sisters all around them all the time and leaving early to visit his old primary school for his video section. Louis felt bad that he couldn’t speek with his mother before they left but the little kids were freaking out over them and that was quite a good feeling to have. He turned to look at the others and saw his feelings reflecting on their face and he was grateful that he was with them. They understood everything he felt.

After arriving back to the X-Factor house the good feelings they all had from the performance in Wolverhampton changed to nerves about the following day. They knew it was already a big deal that they made it to the semi finals but neither of them wanted to end it there. If they made it this far they could win it as well. Go big or go home right? A lot depended on the upcoming show and it made all of them a bit edgy. Zayn went to bed immediately and he threatened Liam that he quits the band if he dares try to talk to him. Niall paced back and forth in the middle of the room biting his nails and humming their first song for the following day. Louis hopped onto his bed with his clothes on and stared at the ceiling with his armes behind his head when he felt his mattress press down a bit on his side. He turned his head and saw Harry sitting there looking nervous and shy.

’’You okay?” he asked sitting up leaning his back to the wall.

’’Uh, yeah, I guess. I’m just a bit nervous you know. I really don’t want to go home tomorrow. We’re so close” he said looking down at his fists in his lap. 

’’I know sun. I’m pretty sure neither of us want to. Come here curly” Louis smiled at him offering his hand. Harry took it and climbed into the bed to cuddle Louis. It was one of their favourite things to do. Louis loved how Harry’s curls tickled his chin. Niall stopped pacing and looked at them smiling.

’’You’re so cute”

’’Thanks” Harry smiled back at the blond boy.

’’We know” said Louis at the same time with a straight face. Harry looked up at him his eyebrows furrowed but his eyes smiling. Niall snorted at him and sat down on Harry’s bed opposite them.

’’I have been thinking” he started.

’’Don’t hurt your head” Louis said smirking. Niall just pulled a face at him and continued.

’’I think we’re going home tomorrow” they all froze. Liam looked at Niall from across the room his eyes scintillate. Louis hold his breath and felt Harry’s tense in his arms. Even Zayn looked down from his bed revealing that he wasn’t actually asleep.

’’Why do you think such things or even say them out loud Niall?” asked Liam a bit harsh.

’’Because it’s gonna happen. Rebecca and Matt are way better than us and we should be prepared to leave tomorrow” Niall said trying to look at everyone at the same time.   
’’Bullshit. Shut up Niall” Zayn groaned and put his head back on his pillow. Liam shot an agry look towards Niall but didn’t say anything more and turned back to his book that he wasn’t actually reading. Louis breathed out.

’’You might be right. But don’t think about it for now. Let’s deal with it when we have to. If we have to at all” he said and was glad to feel Harry relax a bit.

’’Yeah. Just thought I’d tell you or I don’t know” Niall tried to act like he didn’t care but Louis could tell the blond boy was really worried.

’’Let’s not next time” Zayn growled turning to his other side showing his back to the others trying to fall asleep at last. Harry looked up at Louis and kissed his cheek. Louis looked down at him and saw him nodding towards Niall. He understood Harry’s intentions.

’’Hey Nialler. Let’s not be worried. Going home doesn’t equals giving up the band. We have a massive fan base as we saw in the last two days. We can continue easily without winning I’m sure” he said smiling at the blonde one. Niall looked calmer in a second and smiled back. Louis felt a reassuring press on his waist caused by Harry. He knew he said exactly what he needed to.

* * *

’’The public have voted. I’m about to reveal which two acts have received the most votes and will compete head-to-head in the X-Factor final and which act has received the fewest votes, finished third, and will be leaving the competition tonight. Good luck to everyone” said Dermot as they all stood in the blinding and hot lights of the stage. ’’In no particular order the first act through the next day to the final is..” he continued and took a pause. Louis hated this part. He just wanted to know if they’re out or not. He already heard Harry breathing louder behind him. The crowd were screaming all three names and he was alread sweating in the heat of the reflectors. Louis felt really uncomfortable.

’’Matt!” Dermot said and they heard Matt screaming. They still had a chance of potential winning but Louis started to doubt it.

’’The second act still in the final is..” Dermot paused again and Louis could strangle him for it.

’’Rebecca!” Louis heard and his brain shut down. They were out. They had no chance of winning the show anymore. That was it. Everything was over. He heard Harry clapping behind him so he turned to hug Rebecca. She really deserved it. As he turned he saw Simon’s back. Their mentor turned his back at them when they failed. What a nice thing to do. He hugged Rebecca and heard Zayn say

’’Niall was right afterall ha?” his voice was undoubtedly disappointed. Louis knew how he felt.

vvv

’’Louis! You okay sun?” Louis turned his head to his phone. He forgot he was still talking with Harry. His memories took over his brain.

’’Yeah sure darling just a few memories you know. It was terrible”

’’Yesterday or eight years ago?” asked Harry in an understanding voice.

’’Both to be honest” Louis’ mood was worse than it was in the morning when he put Armstrong’s suitcase in the car.

’’Darling I love you but can I call you back later? The boys are gonna be here soon and you know it wouldn’t be great starting another roumor” Louis said thinking about how his boys couldn’t keep their mouth shut if they knew. He loved them but they were true gossipers by blood.

’’That would’ve been a great idea, love, but I think it’s too late for that now. Hi guys” Harry said waving. Louis’ heart skipped a bit and turned away from the window facing three surprised but smiling looks.

’’Hi Harry” the boys said in the same time and started laughing. Louis panicked.

’’Yeah uh gonna be back soon okay?” he said starting for the door. ’’And talk to you later Harry. Bye” he only called his boyfriend by his first name in official places and the The House definitely wasn’t one. He knew Harry could tell something wasn’t right but he didn’t care he hung up the phone. At first he wanted to go to his room but figured everyone would look for him there so he turned around and went to the back stairs instead. These stairs again. He got annoyed by them for a moment until his phone started ringing. It was Harry. Of course it was him. Louis almost didn’t answer but thought that wouldn’t help anyone.

’’Louis what’s the matter darling? What happened there? They were just your contestants not some random people from a gossip magazine” Louis thought he was getting told off until he saw Harry’s worried face.

’’I know. I don’t know. I’m just so used to hiding our relationship that I freak out when someone new gets to know. Especially three. Especially when it wasn’t my intention to tell them. I’m sorry” Louis aready felt stupid about his reaction but he couldn’t help it. He was only 18 when he first had to hide his relationship with Harry. It gave him so much anxiety. It was almost in is blood. Harry’s face was sad and angry at the same time.

’’I know love but we gonna make it through don’t you worry”

’’I know. If we made it through 8 years..”

’’Yeah 8 years? Weren’t there breaks hun?” Harry interrupted smirking.

’’Oh shut up you know I thought it was the best idea!”

’’Two times? When the first one was horrible enough?” Harry was laughing. Louis just made a face at him. He loved that they could joke about their break ups now.

’’Louis? Are you here?” they heard Dalton’s voice from the end of the corridor.

’’How the heck did they found me?” Louis whispered ’’No I’m in my room” he shouted back. He heard Antony and Brendan’s laught too.

’’Looks like they know you already” Harry smiled on his screen ’’Talk to them and I’ll call you in the evening love. I love you”

’’Love you too” Louis said and Harry hung up the call.

’’Aw that was cute” Brendan said smiling as they reached the stairs.

’’Didn’t wanna freak you out Louis we’re sorry. Also we knew already” 

’’What do you mean yuo knew?” Louis looked at Anthony surpried.

’’Well we had internet access in the last 8 years bro” answered Brendan almost laughing.

’’Oh right. Didn’t think about that. How stupid I am” Louis hit his forehead.

’’Now tell us about everything. We want to know what’s true and what isn’t” Dalton asked him in a high pitched voice.

’’What are you? Teenage girls?” Louis looked at them narrowing his eyes.

’’Yes!” they said at the same time and started laughing again.

’’Alright alright” Louis tried to calm them putting his hands up giving in. 

He didn’t know how many questions they had. It was a lot. Most of them he couldn’t answer because he didn’t remember. They were in Wellington? Harry told him something on stage during the Up All Night tour? They were love birds during a Valentine’s Day inteview? Oh yeah that one he remembered. But the years with the band kinda blended into one dream. He couldn’t tell the years apart in his memory.

’’Did you actually broke up with Harry in 2012?” asked Brendan twenty minutes later. Louis’ heart ached a bit at that.

’’I did yeah. Thought is was the best for both of us and the band. Turned out it wasn’t true”

’’What about 2015?” 

’’And how the hell do you know about that? We weren’t even working together by then”

’’Well as I said eariler. We had internet. I am a Larry shipper what can I say” everyone started laughing at Brendan’s statement.

’’But you didn’t write fanfictions right?” Louis asked hoping that the answer gonna be no but he knew he had a low chance of that.

’’Fanfictions? I genuinely seriously don’t know what are those” Brendan smirked at Louis.

’’And now I know for sure that you’re lying” he laughed.

’’Did you actually get married in 2013?” Anthony looked like a child waiting for his candy.

’’Of course we didn’t. I was 21 and Harry was only 19. We might meant to be but we were too young for that. I did ask him tho. He just said no. He said he won’t marry me for at least another five years…” Louis said thinking about what he just figured out.

’’That’s now mate! He would marry you now!” Brendan was almost screaming ’’Oh my god I can’t believe I know you now. I feel like now I’m a part of something huge and beautiful. Okay I feel like I’m a teenage girl I’m sorry. I’m gonna stop talking now” he trailed off. 

Louis didn’t really hear him. His brain worked with a hunder miles per hour. He barely could follow his own thoughts.

’’Sorry guys I gotta go now. I’m gonna be back in two hours top and we gonna rehears. Try to think of a song you’d want to sing till then. I left the list of the suggested songs on the table” Louis was already on his feet and hurried towards the front door.

’’I bet he’s off to buy an engagement ring” he heard Brendan’s voice from behind him. He wasn’t quite wrong. But wasn’t right either.

* * *

’’Good morning lads! I have a special guest for you today. I thought it would be a great thing to celebrate with that Brendan was awesome and stayed last night and I know you all love him. And also I missed him as hell and that’s the real reason he’s here the others are just excuses” Louis said walking in the rehearsal room. It was two days after the boys officialy find out about him and Harry. He didn’t close the door behind him. The boys were chilling on the sofa waiting for him but they stood up immediately when they saw Harry walking in behind him. Brendan turned around and walked over to the wall and hit his head hard into it.

’’Bloody hell mate what did you do that for?” Harry asked him. Brendan hit his head into the wall again before he turned back.

’’I feel like a 13 year old girl and I somehow had to make myself not to scream” he said his face turning red. Harry looked at Louis and held back a smile.

’’I didn’t teach him that I swear” Louis smiled widely at his boyfriend not helping in believing him at all.

’’Sure thing. He told us to fill our mouth with carrots if we don’t wanna scream because it worked for him” Anthony said grinning.

’’Oh shut up. Did not say that either” Louis slapped the back of Anthony’s head. Harry laughed at that and turned to Dalton.

’’How are you buddy? Is this wanker a good mentor? Just tell me if you want to change him I’d be glad to step up” 

’’Hey you supposed to be supporting me!” Louis protested.

’’In sickness and health right?” Brendan asked with a smirk.

’’What?” Harry looked a bit confused.

’’Shut up” Louis said in the same time. Harry looked at Louis asking for an aswer he couldn’t give him yet. If that kid just ruined everyting he was gonna kill him, Louis swore.

’’Okay guys look through the potential song lists again and try to narrow it down to three while me and Harry…”

’’Harry and me” Harry interrupted. Louis pulled a face at him and continued.

’’So while me and Harry go around a house and have a little nostalgia. We gotta choose a song today” he finished walking towards the door already pulling Harry with himself.

’’You’re so cute” Brendan said.

’’Thanks” Harry answerd smiling.

’’We know” Louis said not even looking back. Harry giggled as he followed Louis out of the room leaving the boys laughing.

’’The nostalgia starting already ha?” he asked when the door shut behind them.

’’I don’t know what you’re talking about. Now kiss me you fool” Louis said stepping on his tiptoes to reach his boyfriend. Harry giggled again and kissed him back.

’’Don’t steal my lines” Harry said after the kiss. ’’I gave you everything. Leave my lines to me please” Louis just snorted at that.

’’Yeah but I had eveything you had so I didn’t really need them did I? C’mon. Let’s kiss at our spot. I didn’t like it as much without you”

’’That’s a lie. I know for a fact that you were sitting there every day”

’’Maybe. But I didn’t say I enjoyed it” 

’’Why would you sit there if you wouldn’t enjoy it?” Harry laughed following Louis towards the back stairs.

’’Dunno. Thinking about you and how far you are from me? I’m a masochist you know that”

’’Well I’m here now so you can stop those hurtful thoughts”

’’Yes boss!” Louis smiled as they reached the stairs.

’’These are smaller than I remember” Harry said looking up the stairs.

’’No hun. Just you got bigger” Louis smiled at him.

’’That’s true. I’ve been in the gym in the last couple of days again not having my exercise parter around” Harry said winking at Louis.

’’That’s what I am to you? An exercise partner? Excuse me?” Louis laughed.

’’Well I could find a new one if you insist on being just my boyfriend”

’’Don’t you dare Styles. You say that again and I’m leaving you”

’’Again? I think I’m kinda used to it by now. But I’d have you rather not leaving me ever again if possible please” Louis looked up at Harry’s green eyes. He knew his boyfriend told the truth. Not that he ever questioned it. Harry never loved anyone other than Louis and he could thank himself that short relationship with that Brad guy back in 2013. That wouldn’t have happened if he wouldn’t have been a coward. That was miserable and he knew he never wanted to experience that feeling again.

’’Totally possible. Let’s sit down and fulfill why we came here” Louis pulled Harry down with himself and sat in the same pose as they did all those years ago. Their legs got longer since then so they couldn’t sit cross legged like they did before. Louis held Harry face while they were kissing and Harry hugged Louis’ waist. It was funny how he didn’t have to lean in at all to reach Louis perfectly.

’’I’ve missed you” Harry whispered.

’’I’ve missed you too” Louis smiled and gave a pack to Harry’s mouth before he let him go. ’’Remember how we got together the second time?” he asked casually. 

’’Of course I remember!” Harry laughed deeper than usual warming Louis’ heart ’’You bloody propose to me!”

’’Yeah. I actually would’ve marry you back then if you would’ve said yes” he laughed too but only to hide his nerves.

’’Good thing I said no then. We would’ve divorced two years later oh my”

’’Well probably. Or maybe not. We’ll never know. But do you remember what else you said other than no?”

’’What else…? That you’re stupid and marriage is not a solution to a teenage relationship?” 

’’Yeah I really didn’t like that since I was 21 by then” Louis acted as he was angry ’’But I wan’t thinking about that”

’’What else did I say? Oh that I won’t marry you for at least another five years? Yeah I said it because back then it seemed like five years would never come. But it’s actually uh…” Harry trailed off and his eyes went wide.

’’Now. Yes love. And my opinion hasn’t changed. So…” Louis pulled out a tiny navy blue velvet box from his track suit bottom’s pocket ’’Harry Edward Styles. Are you so stupid to want to spend the rest of your life with me? Will you marry me?” Louis opened the box and Harry’s eyes went even wider. The ring was familiar to the one Harry used to have and accidentally broke a few years back. It was white gold instead of silver like the one he used to have but it had the little dancing bears around it. The big difference between his old ring and the one Louis was holding was that it had little diamonds between every little bear. It was the same ring Louis had proposed to Harry five years back. Louis could see the tears filling up Harry’s eyes.

’’You still have it?” Harry asked. His voice was higher than usual.

’’Well obviously. I’m holding it. But would rather put it on your finger now darling so if you think you could answer that would be lovely” Louis said in a joking voice but actually he was terrified of being rejected again even if it didn’t mean breaking up.

’’Bloody hell of course! Yes! I will marry you!” Harry almost screamed. Louis breathed out. He didn’t even notice that he was holding his breath. He took out the ring of the box and put it on Harry’s ring finger with his hands shaking. It still fit perfectly.

’’I love you Boo Bear!”

’’I love you Hazza”

They leaned in to kiss each other at the same time. Louis’ heart could burst out from happiness. They’re getting married!

’’I used to think marrying your first love is stupid because they are your first love how do you know they’re the one? But when you find the one you just know. And now look at me being engaged to my first real crush” Harry laughed still fighting with his tears.

’’CONGRATULATIONS!” the boys were running down the corridor. Brendan was crying and hugged both of them at the same time.

’’I’m so happy for you guys you don’t even understand!”

’’We all are” said Dalton and shook hands with Harry and gave Louis a half hug.

’’Can I be your kid?” asked Anthony with a straight face. Louis looked at Harry with an apologizing look. He already felt they are his kids.

’’Can I be? It’d be awesome! Just the three of us forever. Just me and my larents” Brendan spoke in a dreamy voice.

’’Larents? Parents isn’t is?” Harry asked looking at Brendan questioningly.

’’Oh no why did you ask” Louis held his head in his hands already.

’’What? What’s wrong with this question?” Harry didn’t understand.

’’Larents. As Larry parents” Brendan answered.

’’See?” Louis giggled.

’’Wait a minute! In sickness and health? You knew? You told them?” Harry looked shocked and looked back and forth to Louis and the boys.

’’Well they kinda reminded me that the five years have expired. It wasn’t my intention”  
Louis said smiling and looking up at his fiancé from under his lashes.

’’Oh don’t look at me like that. Come here and kiss me you fool”

’’See? You got your lines back” Louis said smugly before kissing Harry back. The boys were clapping around them. Louis pulled away jumped up and ran up the stairs screaming just like after their first kiss. 

’’AAAHHH NOOO KRYPTONITE!!!” He couldn’t hear anything but Harry’s loud and low laugh from the bottom of the srairs. Yeah. That sound definitely was still his kryptonite. After all this time and always.


End file.
